Puss From Facebook:
I'm a bad person because I anger people? Ok, here. I think Vegetarianism is mainly a white privileged mindset when it comes to food. I think there should be limits to how long you can draw unemployment. I think its a shame that most churches don't get the attention they deserve for the hate groups that they are. The worst thing that happen to many people who lived after The Revolutionary War was us winning. Banning any word is a stupid shit idea. Oh, and don't tell anyone but I've touched another mans penis, I guess we can't be friends now.
The only thing I will say on the whole Colbert Report blow up is a question. Why aren't all these people so pissed off about the Colbert segment also really pissed every time the Redskins have a game on TV? People are attacking him and the show and not going after the real racism that he was addressing.Its internet distraction bullshit and the way most people handle the discussion of issues these days. They really can’t defend their racism so they say look over here instead. All of this tells me a couple things. Racism is fine in America as long as tackling it wont hurt my FOOTBALL and its fine as long as its against Native Americans.
So many people, including myself, see the Affordable Care Act overall as a good thing but many are just tired because of what Florida has done with not expanding Medicaid. A friend told me the other day "The Florida government has basically said go ahead and die so we can make a point." I have to be honest and say I'm starting to feel the same way. You don't want to think politicians want people to die to make a point but it starts to feel that way. Tragic that the circumstances of what state you live in will decide life and death.
Mucus From Twitter:
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 21
Just cut 4k words out of something and that never gets easy. Still feels a little like failure but time to get on with things.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 21
I'm up at 2am writing. I could be up at 2m planning the destruction of every thing within my touch. THREE CHEERS FOR DELUSIONS OF GRANDEUR!
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 21
Today was a shit bag day so tonight move on and get stuff done
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 21
Really love writing right now more than I ever have. Doing monthly releases is teaching me so much. Might be stupid but I like the learning
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 22
It's the night before a release because I'm sick, coffee at 2am, thinking about taking my clothes off walking into ocean Douglas Adams style
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 22
I just had the top half of a double root canal break off. Lucky I didnt swallow it because it has two small screws sticking out.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 22
I need a couple hundred beers now.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 23
Im just going to sit outside and write in a notebook while listening to Set Fire To The Rain and everything else can be fucked.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 23
Mar was talking to me and all of a sudden "Squirrel!"
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 23
"You are my master and I loove you"
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 23
Me"Im starting to feelings, I need another beer" Mar"Feelings are hard"
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 23
Beer, why the hate?
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 23
Friend took me for drinks as a distraction. Worked but headache now.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 23
Now Im doing what any sane person should do when finding themselves in a bad spot, watching Doctor Who.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
My fav answer from writers when it comes to not writing diverse characters is "I'm afraid I wont do it right" Well, in fact that is a cowardly way to write and also research.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
If you make a mistake. Take in the words of others and learn from it.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
I'm not happy about the change from Kitty Pride being the lead character in Days Of Future Past to Wolverine but I understand it.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
I'm channeling my time in Philosophy classes in what I'm writing today so its long winded, uses big words, and says absolutely nothing.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
Projects are the painkillers for poor writers. Just added a second poetry collection release for 2014. One in June and then another in Oct
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
TMNT, ice cream kitty? This episode is twisted and great.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
"Smell the cheese!" I love this show.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
"You're my hero, and you taste so good"
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
It was really good. I didn't think I'd like this show as much as I do. Can't wait until I get season one from the library.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
Been reading up on a lot of local apartments and many are saying cats must be declawed. Thats fucking bullshit and cruel.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
And many are using outside companies to overcharge for water, sewer, and such.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
And I live in a state that protects companies over people at every turn.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
Looking through public domain image. The mindlessness of it is keeping me from screaming.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
Im making a cake at 9pm because the rest of the world can kiss my ass and cant have any of my cake.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
Chocolate yellow cake with creamy frosting. Asshole neighbors cant have any. The fuckshit complex people, none for them. Only us.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
I hate noisy neighbors with the white hot hatred of eating a whole cake.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 24
Said it before and I'll say it again. I don't think most people are good. I do think the good people outshine the bad ones by miles though.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
Love when someone blasting their music until almost 3am and when you bang on their door they act like sorry man, didn't know it was so loud.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
It's 3am. One, yes, very loud. Two, doesn't matter IT'S 3FUCKINGam. And I'll add a Three in 3 Scarface posters in one living room, lame.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
I could be friends with a murder. A serial killer for that matter. But if you think its ok to blast music at all hours. I don't like you.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
I'm so pissed off my head is pounding and heart racing. I don't know if the music has totally stopped or I'm just pumped with anger.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
Friend"People talk about going to jail for free healthcare but no one ever seriously thinks about it." *I raise my hand*
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
I watching The Bob Newhart Show today so I can hear Edna Krabappel's voice while writing.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
Talk of privilege of any kind is twisted back to saying people are attacking someone. It's a bullshit cowardly defense really.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
People want this convo to crumble into a spam war so the real issues are never talked about in detail to get to the real problem
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
Reminder: Talking about white privilege isn't saying all white people are racist.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
Talking male privilege isn't saying all men are evil.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
Talking about first world problems isn't saying your life problems don't matter.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
That response is showing your stupid.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
Just heard back from a job I thought I had locked up. Was even told it was basically mine but nope. Fucking shit.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
So this is what a breaking point looks like?
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
Friend"Is writing a book hard?" Me"Not the way I do it" Mar"You ripped that from Oz" Me"Also even a shitly written book is hard"
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
Mar"I wont wait for you if you go to jail." Me"I wont wait for you in jail."
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 25
Reading DMZ and watching Scott & Bailey because, you know, I needed some cheerful things.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 26
Anxiety has been bothering me all day. A feeling that if I don't keep moving the world will cave in so I'm working on six projects at once.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 26
While working watching The Secret of Crickley Hall. It has Arya Stark and the T.A.R.D.I.S in it.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 26
I haven't even gotten through the first episode of American Horror Story. I'm already more interested in The Secret of Crickley Hall.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 26
American Horror Story to me seems like it trying too hard to be edge and dark and sometimes that's all it has in its moments.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 26
After a cucumber sandwich for lunch I changed my viewing to Meatballs. I haven't seen this since the 1980's
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 26
Will start doing 30 Day Shred first thing in the morning to say sunshine to our asshole neighbors. Might get into shape also.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 26
I'm embracing the darkside of the force.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 26
If youre on the first floor blasting music I'm going to be hit with the desire to dance. Also pick up and drop litter bag.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 26
This exercise through hate of those downstairs might be the breakthrough workout trend of the season.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 27
That Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle trailer....so humorless, basic, and boring looking.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 27
I try to give stuff a chance but that didn't give me anything to say this TMNT has a hope of being good.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 27
Presenting stuff to a wider audience outside its fan base is one thing but I don't know... That had nothing TMNT about it.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 27
And I know people will say the original TMNT comics weren't like the cartoons...
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 27
Ok, the original Batman used guns. There is good change and then there's Michael Bay.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 27
Even though I can enjoy the Transformers movies, though they don't have the spirit of the source materials, it's because it's giant robots.
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 27
A TMNT story is still a street level story. It's a human story with humor and character development. Doesn't any of that ring Michael Bay?
Brian Williams @hangofwednesday Mar 27
A friend"If you had Michael Bay as a second unit director doing the action and put him with another director for everything else. Hit movie"
My Tumblr Spit:
Mar showing off her Expecto Patronum bleach pen shirt. She found the design for it online. She told me at first to cut her head off the picture before posting but I told her that wouldn’t be right because that would make her a YA novel cover.
I made the shirt below to cheer myself up inspired by my favorite zombie book This Is Not A Test by Courtney Summers.
Mar cheered me up by writing this on the mirror while I was in the shower. Take a guess what it said.
This has been a very fuck you week for me. Things started with a email from someone who was part of a community I use to be a part of online and then went to instant messages. I hadn’t heard from this person in years and never was huge friends with them online but it was nice hearing from someone from that time since I destroyed most of my friendships from that time when I disappeared from contact during a breakdown. The conversation was good for the most part until I got this message “Of all those talented people its too bad you ended up the one who failed the most.”
And then the next day in an email from someone I use to go to school with and was pretty close with at one time responding to something I wrote on Facebook about finding a nice dinner jacket I liked and buying it even though it was a women’s jacket. “I really hope you weren’t serious about wearing a woman’s dinner jacket. I’d hate to think bad things about you Brian.”
And another case of a email from a former friend, this one responding to me saying me and Mar don’t want kids. “I think you’re being selfish.” Me”You know what’s selfish…. listen my choice or Mar’s to have or not to have kids is our fucking business but if you want to be a asshole in high waters lets swim. Who is being selfish me for not wanting to have kids because of the world we live in, my financial situation, and the probability of my genes passing on a lot of the health problems I’ve had all my life or you? You have the money to have four kids and good for you and them but you could have also adapted a child already in the world. You could have adapted two. You could have adapted three. So fuck you and your self righteousness.”
And when I thought man that part of the week just sucked ass here came the weekend as half of a double root canal I had a few years ago decided to brake off.
For a long time the screws were stabbing into my gums every time I chewed so this is in a way better. Still hurts like a fucking fucker fucker. The second half of the double root canal is still there but I don’t think it’s suppose to function on its own like this. I check on getting the rest of it pulled and will be selling off a bunch of stuff soon to try and get that done but for now its over the counter meds and trying to find ways of distracting myself.
I few years ago, seems like so many, but was probably just a few, but a few years ago I had a breakdown. Things in life just tumbled out of control and I checked out. I deleted my online presence which was one of the few places I had to turn for help in a purely self destructive action. I cut off contact with all friends- losing most forever. I stopped paying bills = the main reason I’m in unbreachable debt. I mention this now because I’m feeling the same thoughts now. I want to delete my Twitter, Facebook, Gmail, and all other sites. Stop writing. Give up. Find a hole to crawl into. I’ve been unemployed going on ten years. I know to some that seems unbelievable but I’ve tried everywhere and anywhere. I left my old job because they were doing illegal things, things I thought were immoral, but I also can’t get unemployment because it only works if you get fired. Great system. I have health issues out the asshole but mainly I need to have an operation to correct my jaw that’s been needed for years and the main reason my teeth are all slowly dying. Pain is starting to become a shouting in my ears that I can’t turn off, ever. I’m tired of being worthless to those I love. I’m not suicidal. Not suicidal. I’m just ready to stop, to quit, because I don’t know what else to do. That last job I spoke of I begged them about a year ago to take me back. I went to them and in front of others because that’s how my former boss wanted it and I begged to get my job back and they laughed. I can’t get healthcare because I have no job and I live in a state were the government has decided to make a political point and not expand medicaid so screwed and screwed. I finally broke down and tried to get full medicaid but no there also. What else can I do? I can keep fighting, keep surviving, but surviving for survival only? Survival when I’m adding nothing to the whole or more selfishly to the me? They say depression lies and it does but it also uses hard truth within those lies and that’s why its so hard to fight. Something will happen, the days will keep coming and things might turn around or they might not. What I do know is this isn’t easy. I’m at a point where I don’t care what people think as I talk about how things are in my life.
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Coming April 1st 2014
Tin Universe Monthly April Fool's Special
*the fool is that there is anything special about it
The monthly Tin Universe free story series continues as old powers start to make moves into the future, new fighters appear, and in the vastness of space shit goes down.
Someone is zombifying athletes at Clear Cut High School in Utah. Lucky the school has its own young superhero in the person of Mildred Betbeze to try and figure out what's going on. Pep rallies, cheerleaders, new kids in the neighborhood are just some of things our hero and her sidekick slash best friend Aisha have to deal with in the first book in Tin Universe's new middle grade series.
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